Wednesday, December 30, 2009

On The Edge - A Year In Review (Musings From A Contemplative Mind)

First on the agenda, my deepest apologies for indulging in this hiatus over these last few months. I'm quite sure I've been very busy...doing what, I can't exactly say, but it must have been something EXTREMELY important and time-consuming!! In any case, apologies now expressed, time to move forward!

Well people, here we go...spilling headlong into the second decade of this new millenium and what have we learned? As I stop for a moment and ponder back over the last decade, I have to be honest and admit, not much baby! Well, that's not entirely true, I certainly am guilty of having indulged in vast amounts along the information highway. It just seems the more I've digested, the more I realize just how much I actually don't know. It almost feels like a desperate game of catch-up...trying to grasp and digest this deluge of supposed facts and 'expert' opinions we're constantly being bombarded with but in a moment of clarity, coming to the realization of how much it actually affects our lives spurring us to do the things we do and think the way we think with such zealous appeal.

Many, many things have happened over the course of the last ten years that were quite significant and made a HUGE impact on my life, but then again, in the grand scheme of things, maybe not so much. Looking at my experiences from an outsider's point of view could very well make my mishaps (mishaps...what a pathetic understatement!) appear fairly insignificant when compared to others' sordid affairs (she says with tongue in cheek).

Let's take all this information now that quite often has a tendancy to turn into our hardcore beliefs which then in turn, ends up directing our lives based on those same beliefs (whether they're truth or not), and put it into some kind of context. Which now brings me to my point...perhaps certain situations really and truly are only relative to the one who's experiencing whatever it is one happens to be going through at the time. What appears to be an absolute disaster for one guy may not necessarily be looked upon as such a big deal by another. ( thinks there might actually be a lesson in here somewhere, Martha).

Maybe a situation is not perceived as critical for one individual because their perception of that particular hair-raising experience is already in the bag so to speak, possibly having dealt with it in another time and/or place. Perhaps from a metaphysical perspective (surely you jest!), they've dealt with that 'karma' already and have managed to overcome it. Or for that matter, the 'information' having become belief and of which we so strongly take to heart and make our own, ironically forces us to experience unpleasant situations in order to come to our own conclusions. In essence, coming to a place of what is truth within ourselves and basically, knocking all we've learned from outside sources, out of the water.

I really do feel we're dealing with a number of factors when it comes to how, what, and why we are placed in various situations. But, whatever happens to be the key element that is the driving factor in our experiences, it's absolutely crucial in our development as individuals and as a species. And remember, growth really does begin at the end of our comfort zone!

Now, at the expense of sounding too esoterically-inclined, I do believe there may actually be some truth in the whole 'eye for an eye' concept insofar as what we experience and on what often feels like, a daily basis. Does it sometimes seem as though we're constantly spinning our wheels over the same thing, time and time again? I don't know about you, but I do know I suffer from this malady on certain issues, almost continually. What is that definition for insanity again? Oh yes, it's doing the same thing over and over but expecting different results.

And that just about sums it up when I say that sometimes I feel I still have a long way to go in not only recognizing but actually addressing, that which I insist on carrying with me even when the load feels excruciatingly heavy. If taking the time to attend to these pesky little issues that don't seem to want to go away, could actually resolve my own karmic ties with said issues, I'm in!

I think that my resolution (blechh! I absolutely detest that term!) on the eve of this new year will be one of surrender and a sincere request for insight and wisdom into what my soul's highest purpose is for me (and let's not forget, who really is just me anyway...). I think I'd be better off setting aside all that oh so very 'important information' that I've been downloading my head with over these last few years and start really paying attention to what my inner voice might be and has been, I'm sure, desperately trying to tell me. I have a strong feeling that I just may be in for a pleasant surprise!

Happy New Year and Best Wishes to All!!

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